This is Part 2 of my synopsis of the book “The Mountain Is You” by Brianna Wiest. An excellent book that helps turn your Self-Sabotage into Self-Mastery.
This is a must read you must add to your collection!!
Invest in your greatest asset… yourself. Get your copy by clicking below.
Recap of Part 1
- Our mountain arises out of our experience of coexisting and clashing needs.
- The mountain that remains before you is the greatest calling of your life, and once you realize that you will see it is your purpose for being.
- Self-sabotage is a product one’s belief system and to heal self-sabotage, you must change the way you think.
- The greatest act of love is to no longer accept a life you are unhappy with.
- Your new life is going to cost you your old one
- The only thing you are going to lose is what was built for a person, you no longer are.
Make sure you read the rest of this article to learn the symptoms of self-sabotage…
There are 17 so get ready to see which one(s) you may be allowing to hold you back!
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What Are The Symptoms of Self-Sabotage?
The book list 16 symptoms of self-sabotaging behavior. This list will help you identify which one(s) you may be going through right now.
The book also gives excellent methods to resolve each one of these symptoms. You can order the book by click this link
Symptom #1 - Resistance
This is what happens when you have a new project to work on but simply cannot bring yourself to do it.
Or you get into a great new relationship but keep bailing on plans.
We often feel resistance in the face of what’s going right in our lives, not what’s going wrong. Also note that resistance is different from procrastination or indifference and shouldn’t be treated as such.
Symptom #2 - Hitting Your Upper Limit
Essentially Your upper limit is the amount of “good” that you’re comfortable having in your life.
Basically, it is your tolerance and threshold for having positive feelings or experiencing positive events in your life.
As crazy as it sounds and definitely counterintuitive to what you would think… we are not wired to be happy; in fact we are wired to be comfortable, and anything that is outside of the realm of comfortability can feel threatening or scary most of the time until we get familiar with it.
Symptom #3 - Uprooting
This happens when someone finds himself jumping from relationship to relationship or changing their business website again and again, when they really need to handle the relationship issue or take care of the client they already have.
Essentially in uprooting, you don’t allow yourself to blossom because you are only comfortable with the process of sprouting.
Therefore, you are always beginning a new chapter but never really finishing it.
Symptom #4 - Perfectionism
This happens when you expect that your work will be perfect the first time you do it.
Perfectionism isn’t actually wanting everything to be right.
In fact, it has a hindering element to it, because it sets up unrealistic expectations about what we are capable of or what the outcomes of our lives could be.
Symptom #5 - Limited Emotional Processing Skills
A sign of this is when you have inability to process your emotions which means you get stuck with them.
When you aren’t able to process your emotions properly, you stunt yourself.
You will find yourself going out of the way to avoid any possible situation that could bring up something frustrating or uncomfortable, because you have no tools to be able to handle that feeling.
Then you start avoiding the very risks and actions that would ultimately change your life for the better.
Symptom #6 - Justification
Your life is ultimately measured by your outcomes, not your intentions.
It is not about what you wanted to do or would have done but didn’t have the time.
It’s not about why you thought you couldn’t; it’s just whether or not you eventually did it.
You may also be using excuses to help navigate away from uncomfortable feelings that are ultimately necessary for your growth.
Symptom #7 - Disorganization
By leaving our lives and spaces in disarray, we are not just mindlessly forgetting to take care of our surroundings….
We are often actually creating distractions and chaos that serve an unconscious purpose.
Sometimes you self-sabotaging through disorganization because when you have things very clean or organized, you get an anxious feeling.
That anxious feeling is what you try to avoid because it is the acknowledgement that now with things in order, you must get to work doing what you really need to do or develop who you want to become.
Symptom #8 - Attachment To What You Don't Really Want
Sometimes, we fight endlessly to try to force ourselves to want something that we do not really want, and it always leaves us empty, because it isn’t a genuine desire.
At the end of the day, self-sabotage sometimes functions to show us that we aren’t quite on the right path yet, and that we need to reevaluate to determine what would feel best for our lives, even if that means we disappoint some people or even our younger selves.
Symptom #9 - Judging
We all know that judging others does far more damage than we are willing to admit or accept… because it sets up barriers to our own success.
When we set up judgments for others, they become rules that we have to play by, too.
By judging others for what we don’t have or because we envy them, we sabotage our own lives far more than we ever really hurt anybody else.
Symptom #10 - Pride
Oftentimes our worst decisions are made when pride is involved.
When we make decisions based on how we imagine people view our lives, not how they actually are… this is not only inaccurate, but it is also very unhealthy.
Symptom #11 - Guilt Of Succeeding
This can come from many different sources, but it ultimately boils down to feeling as though you “don’t deserve” to have it.
When it comes to success, guilt is unfortunately a common emotion, especially for good-hearted people who want to do the right thing and live authentic lives.
Symptom #12 - Fear Of Failing
This is something that holds people back from putting in the work they would need to become truly great at something.
It can also take another, more insidious form… once you have established something new in your life, fear can come up as a constant irrational worry that you’re “missing something,” that your business won’t succeed, or that you’re one misstep away from losing it all.
Symptom 13 - Downplaying Our Success In Life
This happens when you are either trying to make yourself seem less impressive, so others do not feel threatened and therefore like you more, or you are trying to avoid the sense that you have made it,” because you are afraid of peaking.
The idea of having “made it” makes you afraid that you are reaching the pinnacle and are afraid you get knocked off of it.
Symptom 14 - Unhealthy Habits
This is the most common way that people sabotage their own success… when they maintain habits that are keenly keeping them away from their goals.
The fact is one part of our psyche understands that we should be evolving and moving forward with our lives and another part is intimidated by the potential discomfort it would bring.
This typically culminates inner tension and frustration that a breaking point is finally reached, and changes are made.
Symptom 15 - Being Busy
Being busy – People who are constantly “busy” are running from themselves and distracting themselves to the point of being completely phased out of their lives.
Being busy is not a virtue but an indication you cannot manage your time and daily tasks. For the majority of people being busy communicates importance.
It makes you seem a little untouchable to others… when in reality it is the ultimate way to distract yourself from what’s really wrong.
Symptom 16 - Spending Time With The Wrong People
It is imperative to understand that the people you spend the most time with will shape your future irrevocably, and so you must choose them wisely.
If you find yourself in a relationship or friendship that you know is not good, you need to gradually phase out of them.
You don’t need to be mean, rude, or even cut anyone out of your life but realize you must move on to better yourself.
Symptom 17 - Worrying About Irrational Fears And Least Likely Circumstances
This is a very common way that people sabotage themselves without realizing is by preoccupying themselves with fears of worst-case scenarios.
Irrational fears, especially the kind that are least likely to become reality, are often what we project real fears onto.
If you find yourself in a cycle of fear where you constantly repeating random and unimportant one-off circumstances that have a low probability of coming true…
Ask yourself if you have any feelings about something related that is actually valid.
What's Next In Part 3?
The next blog will help you to identify if you are in a self-sabotaging cycle and how to overcome them.
Remember that YOU MATTER!!!
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As Always Dream Big!!!